From a vicious cycle to a virtuous cycle

A BROTHER of mine once gifted me with a gyro ball. It’s a device used for exercise and rehabilitation that strengthens wrists, forearms and hands, and improves grip strength and dexterity. I was amazed at how it works since with a certain movement of the hand, the ball just spins endlessly inside its shell until I decide to stop it. It has a self-generating momentum that keeps it going.

Somehow, the device reminds me of what we may describe as self-perpetuating cycles in our life that can either be good or bad, virtuous or vicious. And nowadays, with the proliferation of all kinds of addiction—from alcohol to drugs to pornography and sex—we somehow need a kind of gyro ball that can replace the vicious cycle into a virtuous cycle.

In the area of sexual addiction, for example, I am happy to note that there are now initiatives that promote the ideal of holy purity that would put sexual desires and actions in full agreement of God’s natural and moral law. It’s an ideal that definitely brings joy and peace of mind, and would put us on the proper path toward our ultimate goal in life, which is our sanctification.

These initiatives apply the wisdom and science of behavioral therapy to the challenge of overcoming addictive sexual behaviors. They show ways of how to gain mastery over our cravings, anxiety and distraction, using the research results, for example, in neuroscience, psychology, physiology and medicine. Of course, the religious, spiritual and supernatural inputs are used as anchor of the whole exercise.

This behavioral therapy addresses the momentum that drives virtuous and vicious cycles of behavior alike. In the vicious cycles, this momentum involves the process of increasing automation as one tries to escape from painful emotions. In virtuous cycles, what is involved is the growth in the sense of meaning, mastery and enjoyment that comes from the pursuit of the ideals proper to us as persons and as children of God.

In all this, the virtue of patience is needed first of all. It enables us to be willing to suffer the cravings for the sake of a higher and proper goal. It allows us to see the cravings as precisely the opportunity to convert the vicious cycle into a virtuous one.

This exercise also involves a certain kind of reframing that would train us to see trials as opportunities instead of threats. This kind of reframing would change how our brain works during a trial, changing the craving into an ability to make moral decisions. It will teach us how to be less impulsive and less prone to distractions, making our cravings much easier to manage.

In the end, what is most helpful is for us to be totally open first to God and to those who can help us spiritually, morally, psychologically and emotionally. For sure, a lot of sacrifice is needed, but we have to be assured that all the things needed, both human and supernatural, are all available. We just have to do our part.

It’s highly advisable that we would have recourse first of all to a spiritual director. We should lay all the card on the table without hiding anything. And if the seriousness of the problem warrants it, we may need to have professional help from psychologists, psychiatrists and doctors.

There’s always hope. Christ assures us of success. We just have to do our part.